Category Archives: Uncategorized

Super Bowl Li, in the books

What did I just see?

A 25-point comeback? In the Super Bowl? Are you kidding me?

I picked New England going in and gave up on them somewhere in the 3rd quarter.I was right, then I was wrong.

Greatest comeback of all time. Greatest Super Bowl of all time.

And yes, Tom Brady is the greatest quarterback of all time. Sorry, Joe.

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Super Bowl LI, end of the third

Ugly. Grisly even.

Sure, New England scored a touchdown. Finally. But at one point Atlanta held a 25-point lead.

No team comes back from a 25-point deficit. Not in a Super Bowl.

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Super Bowl LI, halftime

Yep, the game will be decided by defense, all right. The Falcons defense.

Tom isn’t looking all that terrific, and the pick six during the second quarter probably was the final nail in the coffin for a Patriots team that’s clearly being buried alive. Falcons lead 21-3, and no team has ever come back from more than a 10-point lead to win a Super Bowl.We’re looking at an old-fashioned beat down, I do believe. Let’s see how bad the damage will be.

The second half looks to get even uglier.We’re looking at an old-fashioned beat down, I do believe. Let’s see how bad the damage will be.

We’re looking at an old-fashioned beat down, I do believe. The only question is how bad the damage will be in the second half.

Frankly, I’m stunned the Falcons are this good. Tight defense, solid offense, and young. They’re my pick to win next year’s Super Bowl as well.

Off to watch Gaga now.

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Super Bowl LI, end of the first

Ominous start.

Patriots get a lackluster three-and-out on their first offensive series.

Then on the Falcons first series, Devonta Freeman busts a 37- first-down run, but the Falcons offense stalls before they can get another first down.

Will defense decide this game?

First quarter ends 0-0. First scoreless first quarter in Super Bowl history.

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Super Bowl LI pregame

It’s 5:29 Central Time, and I’m ready to roll.

The referees have been introduced, they’ve rolled out George H.W. Bush in his wheelchair joined by wife Barbara on her … I’ll call it a golf cart. They’ve shown the obligatory shot of VP Mike Pence, and 41 just tossed the coin somewhere on the field.

It’s show time! Where are my chicken wings!

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I pick the Patriots. Because Tom Brady …

Why change now?

I’m going with the better quarterback, and I’m still not sold on the Falcons’ Niedermeyer, ah, Matt Ryan.

I’m not sold on Tom Brady either if he really does support Trump, but that’s a discussion for another column entirely. Today, the Saturday before the Super Bowl, I’m talking football only, and I’m going with the deflatorator.

And defense. Gotta like the Patriots’ defense.

But mainly Tom Brady.

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My picks for AFC, NFC champs

So far, I’ve picked all but one team in the 2017 playoffs. My miss? Seattle.

My bad. Once again.

I just don’t know much about Atlanta, and I really don’t have all that much faith in Matt Ryan aka Matty Ice. He leaves me feeling — yeah, I’ll say it — cold. So I picked the Seahawks over the Falcons. But what I really picked was Russell Wilson over Ryan.

I was wrong. I was leaving-Vegas-in-a-barrel wrong.

The other seven times, though, I was right. So I’ll continue with my picks for the championship games. And I’ll continue with my methodology, which is patently simple: the team with the better quarterback wins.

That means I’m picking New England over Pittsburgh. Or more accurately, Tom Brady over Ben Roethlisberger. Two reasons. Brady is better at winning than Big Ben, and Brady’s got home-field advantage. You know what I’m talking about. Cushier balls.

I know. Low-hanging fruit. But if there’s a way to get home-field advantage, I have absolute faith in Brady and Bill Belichick to pull it off.

In the NFC, it’s more complicated. Green Bay has some banged-up receivers, all but one with the “questionable” label. Who knows who will catch the ball for the Packers this Sunday?

But last I looked, that stellar offensive line was still intact. Rodgers will have time to find someone healthy to throw too.

So once again I’m going with the better quarterback, Aaron Rodger, although because of the banged-up receivers and the great offensive line, I’m looking for Rodgers to run more than he has in any game ever.

Run, Rodgers, run.

He’s on a mission, believe it, and I will not pick against him. That, and I think he’s the greatest QB of all time — the true G.O.A.T.

Sorry, Joe Montana. You’re amazing, and you won four Super Bowls, but it’s a different era and he’s got mad skills. He can pass. He can run. He can think. And boy, can he lobby. Did you see him talking to the refs before last week’s win against the Dallas Cowboys? I did. And while I don’t have a recording of the conversation, I would bet good money he was reminding the refs of the rules. Such as look for 12 men on the field when the defense substitutes. And look for someone coming into the huddle, then leaving — and don’t forget, that’s a 15-yard penalty.

I pick New England (easily) and I pick Green Bay (razor-close game). Because of Brady and Rodgers.

We will soon see. About 14 hours from now.

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Three out of four ain’t bad

I only missed one. It was a huge swing-and-a-miss, though.

Who knew Atlanta was so good? I didn’t. They’re looking like the presumptive Super Bowl winner at this point. Seattle didn’t stand a chance, especially when all their defensive players kept getting banged up.

I did see Green Bay winning. Two words, Aaron Rodgers. He makes things happen, and I didn’t see a rookie-laden Cowboys team coming up with the answers, although they almost did. The Cowboys are impressive, and they will be back in the playoffs next year.

But rookies with a week off — not a good thing. It’s not like Dak Prescott and Ezekiel Elliott took a trip to Florida or anything, but they definitely had too much time on their hands. Too much time to think. So that’s one reason I picked Green Bay.

But I mainly picked Green Bay because of Aaron Rodgers. I like the best quarterback to win.

Which is why I picked New England over the Houston Texans. I picked Tom Brady over Brock Osweiler, that wasn’t hard. And I picked Ben Roethlisberger over Alex Smith, too.

Unfortunately, I also picked Russell Wilson over Matt Ryan, and I was wrong. Way wrong. Ryan’s got game. More than I’m aware of, apparently. And the smart money is on New England vs. Atlanta in the Super Bowl.

But I’m picking Green Bay vs. New England anyway. And then I’ll pick Green Bay to win. And you know why.

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Golf now features 6 major events

The PGA officially holds four major events each year — The Master’s, The U.S. Open, The (British) Open, and the PGA Championship. In that order.

But two tournaments feel like majors, include the top golfers on tour, and, let’s face it, grab our television attention. What better indicator of a major sporting event is there besides TV ratings? Nothing.

Do I have to tell you which two tournaments are the unrecognized majors? If so, you haven’t watched golf since Tiger Woods got injured. And even if you watched back when Eldrick could still play (he’s finished, right?) you weren’t really paying attention.

So pay attention.

The other two majors are The Players Championship and the recently contested Tour Championship, which dots the I and crosses the T in determining the winner of the FedEx Cup — which oddly features no Is or Ts whatsoever.

You know The Players. It’s the one held in Florida at the TPC Sawgrass. The golf course with the famous 17th hole, a nickel-sized green surrounded by water, the hole where you get to watch many a pro make the “kersplash” sound when their balls land in the H2O. Just like us.

And the Tour Championship, forgetaboutit. Whoever wins that wins the FedEx Cup, so the tension is palpable. Unless, of course, like Tiger and other FedEx leaders from the past they’re so far ahead that all they have to do is finish in the top ten or so. But this year it felt like a major, since the FedEx Cup winner, Rory McIlroy, came from behind and won the championship and the cup. I suppose on years when the Tour Championship winner is not the FedEx winner, it feels less like a major. I suppose.

So golf now features 5 1/2 majors. That’s what I said, right?

Johnson wins Open

Iowan golfer thanks wife, caddy and Jesus for playoff win

ST. ANDREWS, Scotland — Scotland’s long national nightmare — which for some reason they chose to share with the rest of the world — is finally over. Through the rain, the wind, and the apologetics from R&A, an Open Championship champion has been crowned and his name is Zach Johnson.

Johnson thanked the Open officials, the fans, his caddy, his wife and Jesus — pretty much in that order. Please wake me when the PGA Tourney starts.

See? That’s why I don’t write for The Associated Press. Objective journalism only works for writers who truly don’t give a shit. My passion burns like a fire within me, and usually continues to my shoes, up my jeans, spreading to my shirt until I eventually tumble to earth in a hellish ball of my own creation.

This is why I write a sports blog. It may not pay the bills, but I haven’t gotten fired yet.

“Johnson wins Open” is the perfectly boring headline for the perfectly boring golfer. Yes, he’s a nice midwestern boy. Yes, he’s never fooled around on his wife, I assume. Yes, that’s probably because he lacks imagination as well as opportunity, since he looks like a balding Joaquin Phoenix and talks like a Rotarian giving the treasurer’s report. Besides, Jesus and his caddy would likely always talk him out of it.

Am I bitter? A tad. Think of the headlines I could have written. If the kid from Ireland had won, I could have written “DUNNE AND DONE.” If Jordan Spieth had won I could have written, “I looked over Jordan and what did I see — Ben Hogan.” Okay, that’s more of a lead, but you get the picture.

Zach Johnson won the British Open. Him. And I’ve got nothin’.

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PS — I’ve got a great idea for next year’s British Open. Hold it in Florida.

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