Category Archives: ESPN

Here’s what’s really clutch

ESPN.

The 24/7 sports network is all about clutch. They’ve got a commercial where the word clutch is used seven times, at least.

Even the forum featuring Stephen A. Smith and them other guys after the NBA Championship featured the word clutch ad nauseam. As in, “LeBron was clutch in Game 7, especially when he hit that clutch jump shot to ice the game.”

The Urban Dictionary defines clutch as the ability “to perform under pressure.” Also, “the crucial moment that comes between winning and losing.”

Here are two other words ESPN announcers should learn—redundant and cliche.

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Some people have compared the arrest of Aaron Hernandez—the ex-New England Patriots tight end who is accused of murdering a friend, Odin Lloyd—to the arrest of O.J. Simpson.

But there’s one major difference to me. When O.J. was arrested, I thought he was innocent. Whereas Hernandez seems way guilty to me. Besides being accused of murder, he allegedly shot another friend in the eye last February.

All in all, i think I’d rather hang out with Dick Cheney than Hernandez.
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Halftime report—Texas 42, Baylor 31

By halftime report, I mean I’m going to write everything I can write during halftime of the Texas-Baylor game.

Joe Bergeron is having a hellofa game and looks like the real deal. Love that guy.

Otherwise, whoever kicks the most field goals loses. And since Baylor has the better field goal kicker…

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I took a long look at the Texas football schedule today. The only automatic win is Kansas. Probably because the coach is Charlie Weis.

When you wash out at Notre Dame, I guess you get to coach at Kansas as a consolation prize. Or commentate for ESPN (that’s for you, Lou).

I think the Longhorns could lose to Iowa State, Texas Tech, Kansas State (for sure) and TCU. Hell, the Longhorns could blow it in the second half against Baylor.

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The biggest upset of the day? In my opinion, Oklahoma State over Iowa state, 31-10. Did not see that coming.

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Best game of the day? Texas Tech in overtime over TCU, 56-10.

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Okay, on to other things. Specifically, Lance Armstrong.

So now the whole world knows about Lance Armstrong’s performance enhancing drug use. I pretty much feel the same way as when I heard Elton John announce that he’s gay. I’m not surprised, and I don’t care.

Like I’ve said before, most Austinites are more concerned about Armstrong’s drinking problem than his drug use.

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I know I don’t have many readers. But when two of them are wine writer John Cesano and political writer James Moore, it makes it worth the time. Cheers.

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